fight.

Yes, what i've done wasn't of the principle that you have. and it's something i have to and must change.

but what i heard and found out, breaks me even more.

I've spent time talking things out and through, couldn't sleep cuz i know the gravity of the situation but how you put it across hurt me more than anything else could. What's more the stuff i found out, im the cat- curiosity kills the cat.

You said that you hope i thought things through, i just couldn't tell you how much i thought everything that you dont know that i know through as well... So much so deep so tired i was that slowly as the fatigue set in, the less impt ones faded away... i believe those that were left behind is what the heart truly is telling you...

it doesn't matter cuz i dont think you read here anymore so it's really for me to rant and spill my heart's content out in general.

i dont think im thinking too much, but im totally shattered.

which way sld i pick myself up from?

to me, the future matters more and that is what im inclined to go with.... but it doesn't deny me that i wouldn't think of things in the past. i promised that i wouldn't see you in different light since to me, the past is the past.

The future is what matters more.

That is what i believe in. and yes, i have so high a tolerance that many are amazed by it. to have tolerance for such shit that falls upon me. But hey, if you are worth it, why not?

i guess that's what you feel too.... with everything in retrospect, every situation is different and i can never compare apple to pear, how pear is to mango. even when they are fruits, matter of fact.

i feel as confused and uncertain, im trying to digest and keep myself together to get everything right in my mind to move on right: if im not supposed to do things, i better not do it. i shouldn't test boundaries and let anyone feel that they don't matter to me/ taken for granted.

i feel obligated and suffocated at the same time. i just need to think. properly. right. through.

maybe like what J said: don't think so much, just be a good girl and behave.

period.

如果一個男人真的愛妳

如果一個男人真的愛妳，他冷落妳不會超過三天，
因為想念妳的日子很難度過 ........

如果一個男人真的愛妳，他會給妳一個甜蜜的稱呼，
只屬於他一個人喊的稱呼⋯⋯ ......

如果一個男人真的愛妳，會令你溶入他的生活，
決不會相愛多年後，還讓妳妾身未明 ......

如果一個男人真的愛妳，他會把妳當孩子般寵愛，
但是自己又說不出寵妳的原因…

如果一個男人真的愛妳，他會讓妳開心快樂，
捨不得讓妳流淚 ..

如果一個男人真的愛妳，他的手機會24小時為妳開機，
隨時隨地讓妳能夠找到他 .....

如果一個男人真的愛妳，他會覺得妳是最好的，
不會將妳和其他女人做比較，即便妳並不優秀 ......

如果一個男人真的愛妳，他會抽出時間來陪妳，
即使自己真的很忙，因為他看不見妳會很想妳.....

如果一個男人真的愛妳，他不會要求妳減肥，
因為他把妳的身體健康看作第一位 .........

如果一個男人真的愛妳，他會很想和妳生活在一起，
會把妳看成是生命中最重要的 .....

如果一個男人真的愛妳，他會經常緊緊地抱著妳，
讓妳感受他的心跳 .......

如果一個男人真的愛妳，他會在妳睡著的時候輕輕吻妳，
因為妳是他的天使 .......

如果一個男人真的愛妳，他會讓妳買妳喜歡的東西，
並且很高興陪妳逛街 ........

如果一個男人真的愛妳，他會對妳的家人、朋友都很好，
喜歡融入到他們當中 .......

如果一個男人真的愛妳，他會默默地為妳付出一切，
但很少讓妳知道他所做的犧牲 .......

如果一個男人真的愛妳，他會看妳吃飯的時候傻笑，
然後把好吃都留給妳吃…

如果一個男人愛妳，他會不厭其煩提醒妳吃飯，穿衣服，
聽妳說「煩了」，他還是要提醒妳，因為妳是他的一切

如果一個男人真的愛妳，他會記住妳說的每句話，
哪怕是一句小玩笑，他也會放心裏。
然後努力改變自己的生活習慣。

如果一個男人真的愛妳，在妳過馬路的時候會拉著妳的手，
怕妳橫衝直撞出什麼事，所以不要甩開他的手。

如果一個男人真的愛妳，他的手機裏都是關於妳的東西，
想妳的時候會對著手機傻笑，

妳是他最美好的幸福 ...

Cino.

Post dedicated to Cino.

R.I.P. Cino.

Adopted her slightly after new year... till 26th June 2010.

Pretty mommy... and her life...

Miss her so much. Can't really leave myself alone, else i get emo....

Cino and baby Coco. Borned 12 June 2010.

Exactly 2 weeks before Cino passed away.

Baby Coco and my mommy.

So cute eh?

Cino when she was pregnant,

when i put her outside as i clean her cage.

I love this photo of her.

Truly shows how pretty and gentle a soul she was.

And she was used as a mouse when she first stepped into my life.

By Calvin. =p

not so right time.

I guess saying things at the not so right time doesn't help even when i just want you to know. so say or not say? when is it a gd time or not so right time? I say and i get all emo cuz of you getting your point at me. I don't say, also not right for frustrations build up.

I guess as much as i hate confrontations, some cannot be helped.

I just wanted you to know how i feel. just that i did so at a not so right time. That is the thing im apologetic about.

What a way to end the night after all the sweetness. sigh.

sets in...

i am, but myself. i know i exists for people. (half) my reason, suddenly, seems missing. i feel like i cant do anything anymore. i will, but i don't live truly by my motto.

reality sets in even more now, sinks into the thick skull. no rhyme, no reason, no justification. it is, in no sense anymore.

i will not find a rebound, like what you've said. but worse off, i don't think i'll get emotionally attached to anyone even when i date. cuz i can't bring myself to go through this sort of draining process. it hurts. and maybe, just maybe, no one will make me feel this same way of elation.

materialistically, time and money may tell. but deep inside, i know my answer. and i wish i know yours. and how i wish even more that i can tell the future. you know how i like to read- front, middle n end; sometimes, i just skip the middle.

i just feel empty now. i don't know how now. i am lost.

for you.

Alcohol, take care of yourself and keeping your words.

Some 3 things that appears to be difficult to do, esp the first 2.

Suddenly, i feel very lost at this moment. like what i said, i feel so much but i cant put the right words to the feelings. it's like a turmoil inside. it's like a tornado. i didn't tear as much as anyone else would normally do, but it's the inner massive destruction that hasn't been expressed outward yet. it'll definitely take some time to be. and if that happens, i think no one and nothing can stop me. emotional wreck. right now, i know my face is blanked out. featureless. sad.

i'll never forget how it feels like to be sitting there, just before the "meyer rd" sign. that place will never be the same again. sitting there talking abt the break-up, talking abt the past and future. i wished i could stay there the whole night, for i know that we'll not do that again. i never knew how you felt all, i guess i nv will.

i know you read this blog, it'll be nice to see your comments sometime k? call me out for a coffee sometimes. i'll try to do the same. try. emo sms minimal. u gotta stick around anw.

thank you, calvin. for the happy and sad times, for going the ups and downs with me. for making my life colourful. at the very least, you make me happy. you make me smile. you make me realise i can be a better person. at least i know, i can be important to someone. i can make ppl change. and i love you, always do.

it's not going to be easy. everywhere i go, everything i see, esp in my room, i see things of us. memories of us. i'll try to let go, *shakes head* not gg to be an easy task. u have half of me, letting go half of myself feels not right. every night, my bears and stitches i have to see, reminds me of us. i guess i stubbornly will not put them away.

well, we'll enjoy this trip tog, try to. i dno how to face you and your parents. i dno how to appear in front of them. what should i do, tell me please?

there is, a future for us, to be seen or predicted?

will not be, will never be?

deep inside, i'm hoping it'll be, will be.

and you think.

After gym on tues, i was talking to my sis while in the changing room. later, she texted me and she mention:

Just cherish and grow. Those who give u chances despite ur failings are those who truly understand u.

I have been pondering on it whenever i see the sms. Feelings within me, i can't explain. And while packing my table, i came across the envelope which i scribbled lots of things on. Sth that hit me qt abit was changes must come from within. You must first want to change.

Sis smsed before the previous msg, Don't stress yourself on unnecessary stuff. Time is precious so cherish and put all ur best on the best things in life! Everything has it's reasons and purpose... ;)

I'll leave it open-ended. But truly, smiles abound the sadness. you'll understand it then.

Happy am i to spend time with you. be it just a tan and a movie and a quick breakkie. and to solve the qn after your given clue, real cool, delighted.

I wish i knew God's reasons and plans. Albeit not knowing, we all live lives still figuring it. Auntie Anne told me to enjoy the holiday, i can't rmb what preluded to it. thinkthinkthink.

PS: happy birthday nana (: hope you are doing alright there...

manyathinking.

I lost my motivation to even wake up, so my body sleeps for long. like way longer than it's supposed to be. it's bad, it could be as long as 10hrs. i used to sleep like that, yes, but i got used to even jus 5hrs. anw, sleeping is a pleasure.

Nana's back to Philippines and we're to get everything tog at home altogether. but i feel closer to my family- gg gym with terri, having dinner with mommy and daddy, taking time to even just chat with sherri for half an hour before rushing off. you know, these small activities do help.

I heard your voice, all chirpy and upbeat, got me feeling happy. got me thinking... but i'll keep what i thought out of blog. i'm just happy for you to be happy. cuz it is impt to me. SIGH.

I asked Auntie for the itinerary for the trip cuz i wanna visit cousin in London! but she told me that will probably confirm at the tour agency on fri. requested to revert the plans AND cost then. Then she told me that we'll speak soon and goodnight. Ouhkay. Friday's tml. heh! And no, i wouldn't give you even half of it, Calvin, you wish harder okay!

Got a jab for my rash last night. I'll rather a jab than a slower curing oral medicine. Anw, doc said it's probably allergy (don't know to what) but triggered by either food or mosquito bite while in Tg Pinang. Since sun when i was back.

Tg Pinang was destressing. Lovely night sky i have to sky! too bad, couldn't take the halo over the moon. oh well, no choice, camera din allow. but it was pretty awesome! diving trips should be the same as well, i reckon! yay! can't wait can't wait.

Still thinking should i go zoukout or not. Pretty pricey things for a clubbin event sorta. well, and it's okay free and char that i know gg. not much of motivation or things to look out for leh. well, still thinking.... ....

okay, waiting for sherri reply me on where the cable to the LG phone is. i wanna upload the jab photo to fb! my first jab outside mandatory grounds k!! =P was so excited that my doc allowed and posed for me la, so cute eh! well then, much said, listening to music and online when i'm to study my MM. Back to paper pages now. Cya!

xoxo,

cherri

PS: i dno how to go gym with a weak left arm. crap! =\ oh and L4D2 is out LONG ago and i havent use the frying pan or guitar to whack zombies!! RARR!!

listen.

and there i sat, listening to the music being played. and on comes jason mraz... twice.

i so wanted to send you a msg, a part of the lyrics. but i held back.

i rmb we said not to send emo msges.

i listened on, sang along, thinking of the good times while i indulged in b&j.

and since i cant send such unconventional smses, i can only say it here.

that i miss holding your arm and hand.

that i miss you. havent seen you, your face, your smell.

i wonder if you do too.

and lovely lyrics you shared, i just dl-ed the songs. shall listen later.

i wonder if you miss me too...

and when...

And just when i thought i could handle the world by myself,

i crumble into streams and rivers with uncontrollable shivers.

and when i thought i gathered myself already,

the arm which pulled me back from the door,

gathered me to my source of warm and love.

And the cycle continues... ...

What's more wonderful about it was that

pillows and bolsters fight we're bound to,

happy smacking physical pain we inflict each time

laughed and jeered with each try of cheat and mischief,

ended up with cold dark room of a bigger picture.

I held it all in without fail,

a try or two they had tried to fall,

strong-willed and prideful i am,

none of this ever came to my wildest dreams,

to fall into the arms i fell out of.

swt autumn night,

Orgo is a nice place to hang out and chill. maybe the next time i go, i'll take the pretty angle that i adore- temperate climate looking trees in the background and the stylish indoor glasses in the foreground. pretty awesome chandelier black lights with reflections on the glasses. i dno how words can describe, the best is done by the picture. well, it says a thousand words, as the saying goes.

Someone once advised me to minimize myself from getting into a situation where i'll face rather head-banging problems as opposed to a heartache for a while. i know im someone who learns by experience so i'll rather face problems cuz i know i'll grow and take something back, be it a learning point or sth i need to improve. i guess sometimes it's how much i am open to it or just how long i learn from it.

sigh. but i must learn not to stereotype or anticipate the person's reaction. i think too much, i don't do what must or should be done. which turns out to be worse. note to self: fire and explosion analogy. i must learn to say no, esp when im uncomfortable with the suggestion and esp when it's emotional. i must learn to how keep to my word, esp so when things are small. as they say, small ones lead to bigger ones. i need to be more frank and less accommodating esp when it's too much to accommodate for.

yes, it's rather heart-wrenching to be in this position. but i felt that the solution we both settled on was good enough, better than what i personally would have given. there are things BOTH have to change, but i suppose ive got a lil more to do so.

Learning with an open mind, helps one to accept things easier. And grow faster as well. we all shouldnt give excuses to ourselves. be it quitting smoking, drinking.

come to think of it, some words that he used were rather hurtful. ideas were overwhelming. oh well. like what i believe, i don't blame someone esp when they have my best intentions at heart. sometimes i wish i can tell the person off for scolding/ chiding me. but i cant, i wun.

lavish stuff, no one will complain too much of it. but the cable box is down. i dno why, i'll try to fix it. again =\

there are things a friend should do and shouldn't do. im sry if im rather quiet or aloof last night, i cant put my heart at it the same way. that's how it is when you have a choice. i love to spend time with your family, they have a place in my heart as so do you, without a doubt and needless to say. esp esp you, your mom and dajie. and your dad. and breeze. and steph. and the hamster. and the bonsai potato. and stitch and the puppet dolls. but i dn think i will drop by on my own accord for dinner with you all unless someone requests.

anw e soln will allow us to do our own things, grow at our own speed... i can focus on more things as well; work, family, friends, dance. and we will be happier, less the head-on madness. i want to be the amazing person in my loved ones' lives.

life is SO unpredictable. i received a msg from alvin tan. it was sent by his bro. it read that alvin had a heavy head injury but due to low bp, they cant operate on him and chances of him surviving is really slim. my heart sank. i wanted to sms alvin on tues, asking how is he and all cuz i havent spoken to him for a long while. and now, this. he's only 30 for God's sake.

always ppl ask me how i get my energy from... i always am busy, with lack of sleep but still hype up even through the day and night... my ans? i don't know. i know i seem to have a abundance of it from internally. it helps when you're happy. it does. Happiness fills you positively, gets you going. smile. tiny hops a walk. my happiness now? at least i know i have ppl who loves me. i know i have to carry on with life, being better. having to improve, reaching my goals. it's tough sometimes, yes, very much. but when you know someone out there is concern about you, you feel better. you truly live on... ...

im sry that this all have to happen when your bday is here. esp when it's the same for last year. im truly sry abt it. but i do hope you'll enjoy yourself in your drinking and partying nonetheless.
as long as you're happy... ...

iloveyou.

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who had been called according to his purpose" - Romans 8: 28

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest" - Matthew 11:28

"God is always for you and that he who begins a good work in you will perfect it till the day of Christ" - Philipians 1:6

"Opportunity presents itself for those who are prepared for it."
"Encourage even the smallest positive change in a person... and not criticise or condemn"

Faith is the substance of things hoped for and unseen. Only when you trust even without a need to 'see' then will you begin to understand and trust.

take the lead.

If you trust the guy to lead, you're trusting him... and yourself.

Maybe i haven't been trusting myself that i can do what i set my mind to, that's why i don't get the results that i want and need. I have to.

Dance is about teamwork and respect.

Similar to a relationship. Both parties need to compromise and work together, not apart. Respect the decisions and see the reasons behind them.

I was watching Take The Lead. Though i fell asleep, i caught half of it in total. I miss dancing. i love the confidence i had. i need it back in me, in my life. that's me. i have to find it back bad.

dead.

just kill me.

im not thinking.

i suffering from insomnia.

nth's of interest anymore. not even chocolate.

my bear is my best friend. my comfort (minimal to speak of).

no point trying to think, my brain's dead and so is my heart atm.

leaving myself alone (or in front of the tv) is not a good thing.

i feel drained.

i know i have to find myself. i know i have to reflect and think. but i dont have the energy to do anything already. i jus wanna lie in bed right now. slp and slp. and slp.

i feel like disappearing now. period.

*pouts*

I checked my results online. and now, i'm thinking very much of what is the right step to take next. Should i take an extra year to do 5, 2 subjects. Or should i just do 7 subs in one year?

I know the consequences behind both decisions. But still i'm undecided at the moment of which is the better way to go about with my academics.

I went for a jog just now and the cool weather helped me to last longer but still, i feel as bad. I've snacked qt a bit today already and i guess a swim and tan tml may probably help even more. Ultimately, i know myself better i guess. I just have to cope with more things.

I have to improve my time management alot this time round... to juggle with work, studies, family and calvin. Hmm... i gotta give it a proper think through this time around. cuz it's pretty much a make or break instance.

I did think about changing unis as well but... maybe that would be the last thing i should consider.

Sigh i cant help but sigh. My camera's not working and it's not helping either since i love to take my surroundings esp my food. Oh well. Hopefully outing with steph tml, shopping and dinner will take my mind off a little. I'm thinking of gg to butter or sth... have a drink with steph and listen music. but will see lar.

Maybe trying new recipes will help. hmm. haven't tried making sth in ages already. saw freesia's try in chocolate cheesecake. looks pretty good i must say (:

anyway, i shall go read my articles now. cant type too loudly, cuz it's distracting for the guy working behind me.

Swim and tan here i come yay.

ciaos,
cherri

Note to self

it's been an awful late night ytd. but what can i say for i found trouble myself.
i love how the thunder sounds- terrifying yet calming at the same time. For this is what i need. it's not a glamorous thing to say what happened last night but i wanna state it down to rmb. to look back. And afterall, to note to myself how ashaming i can be to myself, to those who love me, to those who care for me.

I don't want to lose someone who loves me just because of my stupor. It's not worth it.
I don't want to disappoint those who love me, esp Calvin, anymore than i have cuz it's all too silly.
I don't want to be trouble to those around me.

I wanna speak up more. I must learn to take care of myself more. I must never forget that drinking sorrows is not the best thing. And if im feeling unhappy, not to drink and club.

I must give more love care and laughter to those around me, not tears anger and disappointment.

And it's better to speak out cuz no matter how one looks, he is listening. It's better to face it than to keep it within me and drown it on drinking.

I need to grow up more. I need to be more independent and responsible.

I now know who to turn to talk as well. So, when i need to talk to someone (also means i need to speak up!!), i better turn to those who are genuinely concern.

--------------------------------------------------------------------

I've been stuck on this song for a while now... i guess it's worth a lyrics mention in my entry. i nearly teared while listening to it just now on the bus journey to town to meet alex brandon and ruth with calvin. had a gd time laughing but i know through everything, they are ppl i dn wanna trouble them everytime cuz they're a buncha nice concerned ppl. and it's not fair to them even so to have them take care of me. anw here goes...

Black Eyed Peas- Alive.

[ will.i.am ]
I got so much love
For you darlin' and i,
I wanna let you know how I feel

And its true that I love you
And it's true your the only one and I do,
I adore you
And its true girl
You make me feel alive ive ive ive 4x

[Fergie]
You said - you said - you said
That im the only one
You said that im your number 1
Now your gone and I feel numb
Tell me where do we go wrong
You are my best friend and boyfriend
Now its seems like you're my worst friend
I gotta do soul searching
Without you im a whole different person
I aint acting like I used to
I don't feel loved like I used to
It was your love I was used to
Why do I had to lo-lo-lo-lose
Your love your love your love
Your love is what it was
That have me feeling **bust**
***you are my true love***

[will.i.am]
And its true that I love you
And it's true your the only one and I do
I adore you
And its true girl

You make me feel alive ive ive ive 4x
Hey girl ur the only one
**must** be my number one
Now your gone I feel so numb
Tell me how do we go wrong
First friends then we became best-friend
You used to be my girlfriend
Now your my worst friend
Yeah I gotta do a lil soul searching
Without you im a whole different person

I don't even act like I used to
I don't even feel loved like I used to
I guess its your love that I used to
And I feel bad that I lose you
I get so many things that I wanna sa-sa-sa-sa...
I guess this mean that im missing you
Sorry for the things that I did to you
Im so lost without you

[will.i.am]
And its true that I love you
And it's true your the only one and I do,
I adore you
And its true girl

U make me feel alive ive ive ive 4x
I got so much love
...i adore u and its true girl
You make me feel alive ive ive ive 4x

[taboo]
So easy to fall in love with u
And all the things that u do
Baby girl ur so remarkable
So special, so wonderful
So special, so wonderful
So special, so wonderful

Baby girl ur so remarkable

my cranberry cream bun.

Somehow somedays don't feel like others.

Sometimes, somehow you feel like you've never been there before.

Others, make you feel dejavu.

I haven't been blogging, not that there isn't anything to blog.

But it's that i just dont feel like blogging.

There aren't stuff to rant about,

There aren't events to share with.

Anyway, congrats to Calvin on getting his license on his first attempt! (:

Ecstatic i was for him, though he din really seemed on the surface.

Ice age 3 is pretty an awesome show! i enjoyed the plot and storyline. i like the characters and colours. Peaches! Been watching Resident Evil 1 and 2. haha and cal commented that luckily din watch in the cinema or i would have scared him big time. lol.

I'm supposed to be aslp abt an hour ago since i've got a full day of work at suntec convention. Then at night to celebrate melvin's bday. sheesh. dont ask me how i can tolerate. i dno. i just need to slp now. like at this moment.

Cal,

There are so many things i wanna say sometimes that no matter how random they are, i would.

And i just wanna thank you for being there for me, to cut the long story short.

I've got much in my head to think about that i think i have lower tolerance towards you. I rmb reacting pretty nasty to my sis over the phone cuz she sounded all fussed up. I guess i must control my temper abit more despite much in my mind. and a lil kinder will help too aight.

Sometimesireadthemsgesinmyhp,thinkabtandbackabtus.Alltheupsanddownsmakemefeelalot. Butwhatmakesmefeelmostfortunateis2haveyouwithme,sharingmyjoys, andsupportiveyouarewheni'mlowandthinky. I'mgladthaticanbetheretoseeyousmile,shareyourupsanddowns. Andattheendofeday,iknowicanbeabetterpersonbecauseofyou. youseldomputyourfeelingsoutfrontaswell,butihopeyoufeelthesamecuziknowwheniseeyousmile. :)

i've got nth much to type atm so goodnight world.

cherri.

Knock you down.

Heh, not again
Ohh, this ain't supposed to happen to me

Keep rockin', and keep knockin'
Whether you Louis Vuitton it up or Reebokin'
You see the hate, that they're servin' on a platter
So what we gon' have, dessert or disaster?

I never thought I'd be in love like this
When I look at you my mind goes on a trip
Then you came in, and knocked me on my face
Feels like in I'm a race
But I already won first place

I never thought I'd fall for you as hard as I did
(As hard as I did, yeah)
You got me thinkin' bout our life our house and kids, yeah
Every mornin' I look at you and smile
'Cause boy you came around and you knocked me down
Knocked me down

Sometimes love comes around
(Love comes around love comes around)
And it knocks you down
Just get back up
When it knocks you down
(Knocks you down)
Sometimes love comes around
(Love comes around)
And it knocks you down
Just get back up
When it knocks you down
(Knocks you down)

I never thought I'd, hear myself say, ooh, ya'll gon' head
I think I'm gonna kick it wit my girl today, kick it wit my girl today
I used to be commander and chief
Of my pimp ship flyin' high, flyin' high)
Til I met this pretty little missile that shot me out the sky
(Oh shot me out the sky)

Hey, now I'm crashing, don't know how it happened
But I know it feels so damn good
Said if I could back, and make it happen faster
Don't you know I would baby if I could
Miss Independent, ohh, to the fullest, the load never too much
She helpin' me pull it
She shot the bullet that ended that life
I swear to you the pimp in me just died tonight
Girl sometimes love

Sometimes love comes around
(Love comes around)
And it knocks you down
Just get back up
When it knocks you down
(Knocks you down)
Sometimes love comes around
(Love comes around)
And it knocks you down
Just get back up
When it knocks you down
(Knocks you down)

Tell me now can you make it past your Caspers
So we can finally fly off into NASA
You was always the cheerleader of my dreams that
Seem to only date the head of football teams
And I was the class clown that, always kept you laughin'

We, were never meant to be baby we just happen
So please, don't mess up the trick, hey young world I'm the new slick rick
They say I move too quick, but we can't let the moment pass us
Let the hourglass pass right into ashes

Let the wind blow the ash right before my glasses
So I wrote this love letter right before my classes
How could a goddess ask, someone that's only average
For advice, OMG, you listen to that bitch?
Whoa, it's me, baby this is tragic
'Cause we had it, we was magic

I was flyin', now I'm crashin'
This is bad, real bad, Michael Jackson
Now I'm mad, real mad, Joe Jackson
You should leave your boyfriend now, I'mma ask him

Say you gotta put the good with the bad, happy and the sad
So will u bring a better future than I had in the past
Oh Cause, I don't wanna make the same mistakes I did
I don't wanna fall back on my face again
Whoa, whoa, I'll admit it, I was scared to answer love's call
Whoa, whoa, and if it hits better make it worth the fall
(When it comes around)

Sometimes love comes around
(Love comes around)
And it knocks you down
Just get back up
When it knocks you down
(Knocks you down)
Sometimes love comes around
(Love comes around)
And it knocks you down
Just get back up
When it knocks you down
(Knocks you down)

Won't see it coming when it happens, hey
But when it happens you're gonna feel it, let me tell you now
You see when love knocks you down

Won't see it coming when it happens
But when it happens you're gonna feel it, let me tell you now
You see when love knocks you down
Yeah

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The song's stuck in my mind after watching the mtv at calvin's place. it's so sweet. and so upbeat. it makes sense to smile while listening to it. Songs are my energy bar. They give me strength like how some people do cuz they influence you positively and you know it's good. you know it's just right to have them sink.

Sometimes you aren't the best source of positivity, but you give me strength to walk on the street and smile silly cuz i know that i can lean on you when i need someone. cuz i know that when i start my morning, i have you to smile and have you to smile back at. I appreciate them all. Thank you. and i love you, Calvin Phang <3

Bear bear has a place on my bed. and this bear has sth special in my life as well. (sorry for stitch counterpart but this picture is like awesome lar.)

It's not the OMG-it's-so-cute kind, but it's definitely adorable. i carried it on the streets leh- not embarrassed, just shy but feel loved kinda way.

we were unhappy/ pissed/ whatever at each other in the day. but im jus glad we're better now.

anw i gtg turn into bed now. a new day ahead! toodles.

i love you.

No boundaries.

Seconds, hours, so many days
You know what you want, but how long can you wait?
Every moment last forever.
When you feel you've lost your way.

What if my chances were already gone?
I started believing that I could be wrong.
But you give me one good reason.
To fight and never walk away.

So here I am, still holding on

With every step, you climb another mountain
Every breath, it's harder to believe
You'll make it through the pain, weather the hurricanes
To get to that one thing.

Just when you think the road is going nowhere
Just when you almost gave up on your dreams
They take you by the hand and show you that you can
There are no boundaries.
There are no boundaries.

I fought to the limit, to stand on the edge
What if today is as good as it gets?
Don't know where the future's heading
But nothing's gonna bring me down
I've jumped every bridge and I've run every line
I risked being safe but I always knew why
I always knew why

So here I am, still holding on

With every step, you climb another mountain
Every breath, it's harder to believe
You'll make it through the pain, weather the hurricanes
To get to that one thing

Just when you think the road is going nowhere
Just when you almost gave up on your dreams
They take you by the hand and show you that you can

You can go higher, you can go deeper
There are no boundaries above and beneath you
Break every rule 'cause there's nothing between you
And your dreams

With every step, you climb another mountain
Every breath, it's harder to believe

Yeah, there are no boundaries
There are no boundaries

With every step, you climb another mountain
Every breath, it's harder to believe
You'll make it through the pain, weather the hurricanes

There are no boundaries.
There are no boundaries.
There are no boundaries.

====------======------====-----=====----

I tried lucky by jason mraz on guitar on friday night. tried a lil of love story by taylor swift too. but i think i'll go improve on lucky first cuz the chords are easier and my fingers aren't too constricted for a beginner. Some chords really requires my whole hand lar. like 5 or 6 strings to be pressed down. but normally ppl use only 4, no thumb wad. and they are very far away. aiyah i also don't really know how to play that, i'll probably go ask my sis soon lo. IM and EOE on wed and thurs. i'll try studying forr eoe but i think if i really cannot grasp the concept then no choice but to let go. I wanted to try for eoe after cf paper sucked. i left 20mins earlier. anw that's that.

after exam activities~ lots! First, thurs to sat is my salsa chalet. fri wanna go phuture will freesia. sat is alex's bday party. following sat, siti's bday party. the rest of the time would be for work cal family. hmm yup 22yrs old this year already. must make a mark for a start (:

still... go get back on track for dancing. guitar. cook. TAN. jog. blade. food-hunting.

Went prawning with cal and friends last night. so happened that my dad and terri were gg too. hahah sea water prawning seemed more efficient by hand. lol so paiseh but fun. when the prawns swim near, KOP! lol apparently im good at it. at last, i found another talent! ;) BBQ-ed the prawns omg SWEETNESS! the freshwater prawns got BBQ-ed with salt. nice!! =D Know-It-All on facebook sucks. =( i feel zero general knowledge. bleahs. wad mythology, norse, abt singapore (which im kinda bad at omg not singaporean can!) anw you can find so many different tests la. 

No boundaries has nice meaningful words. (: short and sweet.

hahha i just got my collagen water, Pokka's with peach flavoured. i was *complaining* about insufficient intake in my diet. my skin's taking a super long time to recover and all. sadded. okay, shall head back to IM with collagen drink and crispy m&m (: nanina. i hearts IM (for now *winks*)

cherri~